I've been a tad behind on these, I'm currently on Week 8 in real life... oops. So I will be posting an extra one or two this week to catch up.
Goals of 12 week program:
1. Learn to be gentle and positive with and about myself
2. Start habit of morning pages that will carry on for life
3. Break down the liver's (like to live, not liver like thing my generation abuses) block
Week Five: Recovering a Sense of Possibility
This week is about forgetting limits you put on and around yourself. Sometimes the brain holds onto staying stuck because it is less scary then having ideas and then having to work hard for them. It's also about taking away the idea that there is only so much you can get out of life and yourself. In believing that there is so much possibility it becomes easier to relax and work. Yes, you can relax and work at the same time. :)
In this chapter Cameron also explains the need for downtime. No guilt, pleasureful downtime. Do what you want, it may not SEEM like it's helping anything but there are definitely many benefits.
My Favorite Quotation:
... pray to catch the bus, then run as fast as you can.
I like this part of a sentence because it tells you to pray but it doesn't tell you to leave everything to the prayer, it also tells you to work for it. Don't pray to win the lottery without buying a ticket. Not saying you will automatically win if you pray and buy a ticket, but it sure would be hard to win without it.
Put in the time, put in the effort, consult with your creator and/or higher power and go from there.
Also:
You will do foolish things, but do them with enthusiasm.
-Colette
I should have this tattooed on my forehead. Or maybe I'll just make a big poster of it and put it over my bed. Now there's a though. I like this because for so long I have been afraid of people saying I am wrong, or foolish or immature or running away from something. So afraid that I either stand still or do something even more foolish than the original thought. Who cares? Go at it with all you've got and if it doesn't work at least you can say you tried. Definitely needs to be more of this in my life. So what if some people laugh and others shake their heads, some of the greatest accomplishments were said to be pipe dreams.
Enjoy yourself.
Favorite Task:
Ten items that I would like to own that I don't are...
1. record player
2. car
3. canon rebel
4. weighted key board
5. acoustic guitar
6. beautiful quilt
7. perfect fitted blazer
8. chambray shirt
9. jeans as awesome as the ones I had during the Epicentre days
10. brown boots
Of course I was excited about this one. I can find things I want all the time. But I wanted to get more specific here. Think of things I have been wanting for a while, like a long while that are beautiful and functional. I've always lusted over weighted key keyboards. I've always wanted to learn how to play the piano, and guitar. A beautiful quilt was inspired by one I saw at Urban Outfitter. I didn't love the orange in it though so I decided I'm going to have to keep searching. The jeans were magic, I hope to find some just as good in the future, brown boots are going to help my wardrobe become the best that it can be, as are a couple of chambray shirts... A car will help me get around, a record player has been on my mental list for years.
And a Canon Rebel has been an idea for so long, but always put off because of the price.
Check In:
1. Morning pages: 6/7
I have no found the page and a half truth point yet. I sometimes start with something deep and stray, sometimes I end with truth. Sometimes all three pages are just the random things and to-dos running through my mind.
2. Artist Date:
I took myself through the Avenue of Giants AND to see City and Colour in San Francisco. I was not sure I was going to see the show, I thought about skipping it and heading home faster but I took a second and thought about it and realized that I had been looking forward to that show since before it existed. And San Francisco is one of my favorite, happiest places on Earth. I like it far better than Disneyland.
In the Avenue of Giants I stopped a couple of times to take pictures. Gorgeous, gorgeous, peaceful place. Very serene.
3. Instances of Synchronicity:
While it may seem small I did find myself some perfect jeans this week. Yup, American Eagle had some jeggings on sale and they fit great. They seem tight but they don't hurt my stomach, they don't bag out in the butt after being worn multiple times. Glorious!
4. Other issues:
I'm still not sure I am doing any of this right. I came home to find that some of the job opportunities I thought I had weren't there anymore. That happens to me sometimes. I want so badly to show certain people I've got things all ready (not to mention myself) and then a stick gets thrown in the gears. I'm staying strong though and pushing on looking for other things. No time to feel sad, just keep on moving.
xoxo
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